First Kiss

March 1, 2011
Well the DA called last night and claimed she was done with drugs and asked for help on staying clean, I don’t know what to say but I listened, I was then informed that she has worn all hers and the socks I left behind, curious I asked her how many times she changes socks, “3-4 times”. When I inquired in the reason, she has a foot fungus and when she goes for a walk, she has to change them. She goes on a walk to panhandle money and has some story that gets her enough to get a fix, but anyone out there if you feel the need to give, don’t give more than a few bucks, if you feel the need to give 50 bucks, cut a check to the homeless project, or a school in the area.
Memory
I’ve mentioned the kindergarten before, and many of the kids in the kindergarten would follow me (or I followed them) to parochial school, except for a few. Two of them, can’t remember their names, but were “the couple” in class. The guy was “dreamy by all the girls, and the gal was the “it” girl in Class. She was taller than most of the boys and she wore bright colors (this was 1966), and leotards and she was pretty enough most of the boys didn’t have that “gross I hate girls” attitude towards her, of course all the girls hated her, I remember thinking of her a s a hippy because she dressed the “flower child” part. Either way she was beyond my sights, even if I knew anything about girls. During play time they would hold hands and kiss, and we would stare and the adults thought it was cute for a while and would ask them to keep a space in-between.
There was this gal who lived down the street who was in my class whose name was J______ but I hung out with her older brother who was a worldly man of 6 or 7. She used to come over and I don’t remember anything specific about playing with her but one day we were lying in the grass and she asked me to be her boyfriend, and I remember my heart pounding, and I said yes and she turned and kissed me I kissed her back, and my mom started pounding on the window and told me to come in. She teased me that I was starting to look like J______ and I got teased by the family, remember I was 5 and that feeling stayed with me for a long time. So it goes.
Valentine’s day came around and we all exchanged valentines and I was messing around in the yard and I found a rock that was kind of heart shaped and I took the rock to class and asked Mrs. Stone (irony eh?) to help me scratch “I Lov U”. I was really excited and gave it to J____ , and my hopes were crushed when she laughed and said “what do I want with a stupid rock”, I got mad and took the rock and put my arm back to throw at her and she screamed and started running and I yelled “you stupid doo-doo head” and I tried to throw it over the fence, but I hit her square on the head.
She started crying and made a scene and I was scared I was going to get a spanking, but she didn’t need stitches and I was not allowed to take part in snack time for a few weeks and my dad gave me a whooping. And needless to say J_____ didn’t kiss me again, and we made up sort of but she didn’t go to the same school. And a year later they moved away.
Spring break maybe 18 years later, Las Vegas, and we were staying at the Tropicana. We were around the pool, and I was lit, some of the crew I was with was playing Blackjack at the table in the middle of the pool, and on of my friends nudges me and she says “the blond girl is staring at you” , now I play joke on people all the time so I’m like “get out of here’ , but she walks up and asked are you d____ from A_______, and I say “yes I am” and she says “I’m J____ remember me from the neighborhood” “ I’m thinking ITS HER, I”M GONNA GET LUCKY ON SPRING BREAK so I tell Her “Of course I remember you, how is it going” she smiles, kicks me in the nuts, and says “who’s the doo doo head now” and walks away laughing and her friends are laughing at me wearing bikinis.
I’m on the ground heaving, my friends are laughing at me, and I didn’t see her the rest of the week, I lost all my money, got shut out of seeing Rodney Dangerfield, and in the interest of fairness everything after my mom knocking on the window didn’t happen, but it makes for a good story